He Came Out Through The Ale House Window

The weeks that followed were dull but a little less lonely. Hank continued to text and I continued to answer. One date he came over and cooked for me another we played that football game where you slide a coin across the table to get it to hang off the edge for a point and then flick it at each others chests through propped up fingers in a shape of a field goal at a pub I chose. 

I was bored. Again, he didn’t include me in his life, and I was bringing him out with my fam. I began to be reminded why I broke it off 7 years prior. So, I did it again. I told him I wasn’t feeling it and this time he wasn’t as cool about it.

One night I was out with my brothers. We went to some place I had never gone before and I was completely under dressed. It was called a friken Ale House for Christ’s sake. I def didn’t expect girls to be rolling in there in tight dresses wearing their vajazzled vaginas as accessories. I’m exaggerating but you get the idea.

There I was in my band t-shirt, ripped jeans I’ve owned since high school, crossbody patchwork satchel and birkenstocks. I just wasn’t feeling the scene so I decided I was going to leave after a couple beers. One of my brother’s came to me and said, “Hanks here.” I said IDGAF. He said, “that’s what he said when I told him you were here.”

I really didn’t care. Not even a tiny little bit. I felt nothing when he bumped into me and my friends and I felt nothing when I walked away without saying goodbye. Honestly not a twinge of emotion.

I got a beer and decided it was my last one. The place was 3 floors, pretty big and easy to lose people. My brothers were having a great time so I finished my beer and went outside to call an uber for myself, figuring I would just text them to tell them I left.

I walked around the side of the building where it was dark and quiet and sat down in a deep window sill built into the brick wall. The backs of people were facing me through the window. I took out my phone to call my uber.

There was a knock on the window and I looked up to some cutie trying to say hi to me from inside. I smirked, half waved back and looked away. There was a second knock and this time the cutie got pushed to the side by guess who. Fuckin’ Hank. Turns out the cutie was Hank’s buddy that I had never met cause remember, Hank never introduced me to his friends, and Hank wasn’t having it.

Hank started mouthing things to me through the window and I pretended to not know what he was saying. He then started texting me and I responded to the text by reading it in front of him and putting the phone back in my purse without responding. The text said that I was the most beautiful girl in the place and he’s sorry for whatever he did and could he have another chance.

He then called me and I didn’t answer but when I looked up at the window again Hank wasn’t there. And when I turned back around he was standing in front of me. Huge smile on his face, clearly nervous and for some reason the vulnerability amused me. I took out my phone and checked the status of my uber. Hank said, “Cancel it. Let me take you home.” And I did.

We started seeing each other again. WHY?! I knew he wasn’t the one. I knew! Why did I feel some sort of obligation to give him another go? It was so long since someone fought for me. It felt good to be wanted. Even for the wrong reasons.  And the chance encounter I thought maybe was a sign. Turns out it was just the universe giving me what I am used to. Shit dudes with their own agendas feeding me false hope that I dutifully swallow and wash down with booze.

Coming up next the bizarre end of Hank that remains a mystery still, to this day.

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