Sometimes I doubt myself. I'm unsure where this energy comes from but it's usually when I'm on the verge of breakthrough.
I have also noticed that I have been talking about breakthrough ALOT lately. These times in my life have been the most rewarding but also the most challenging. So many times I wanted to quit. Well, my body and mind wanted to. My spirit has other plans, tho.
I am constantly trying to talk myself out of my worthiness. For one circumstance to blame my own neglect on or another I talk myself out of self care and making myself a priority. And believe me, there are a million reasons!
I talk openly about the last 2 months for me. The break up between me and my son's father, living alone with all of the financial responsibility, the death of Striped Kitty and my Grandfather. There are more that I don't talk about like, the diagnosis of cancerous cells on my cervix, the mutation in my dna that mimics ms and anemia, my baby son's constant visits to the doctor's office and emergency rooms, and my teenager's bouts with depression.
My point is there are a million reasons to give up. So many I can't count them all and all of them are legit real reasons that people would say, "I can't blame her."
BUT there is one reason to stay the course and trust God has a bigger greater plan for me and for you. It's the reason my spirit is in constant battle with my flesh and circumstantial mind. I AM WORTHY. YOU ARE WORTHY.
You are worthy of love. You are worthy of care. You are worth of recognition. You are worthy of respect.
It doesn't matter who you are what you do for a living, or what you own. You belong here. God has a plan for you. It's so easy to lose faith in our worthiness. So often we think we're not good enough or don't measure up especially when we face challenges in our lives like a breakup, death in the family, failed test, a lost job, a serious illness, a depressed teenager, or (insert your challenge here), it can feel like we're less deserving and less valueable to the people who are counting on us. It can seem like we've lost our worthiness. So we do more for them and less for ourselves. But the thing is, worthiness is inherent in each person. It can never be taken from us. We can forget these truths and when we do it makes the heartbreaks and dissappointment of life even more painful than they need to be. So, how can we remind ourselves of our own worthiness when we've fallen into doubt and shame?
I meditate daily, as do all of my girls. All of the women in my group coaching and private 1 on 1 clients do this and today's meditation was worthy to note. Here is one way that I learned in today's meditation. Hopefully I am helping someone by sharing it with you:
One way to rediscover your sense of worth is to use your imagination. Picture yourself as a baby or a child. A baby doesn't have to earn the right to be loved. When we look into their soulful blinking eyes we view them as precious. We are compelled to care for them and inspired to love them unconditionally. We instantly see their worthiness, inate and profound and unchanging. When it comes to ourselves it is so difficult to do. So the next time you lose sight of your own worth try imagining yourself as a baby or child. Maybe even pull out an old photograph. Imagine being held tenderly with love and care. Remember that when you are tiny there is nothing you need to accomplish. No standard you need to measure up to. Your worthiness shines like a bright light even while you are vulnerable and dependent on others. You are complete and perfect just the way you are.
When you get to a place where you understand that love, belonging and worthiness is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible.
I hope this helped someone cause I sure feel better! LOL
I'll catch ya on the fit side. xoxo